Dutch people can speak English. Teenagers can speak it pretty well nowadays. Education has improved a lot over the past years. However, not everybody can speak English as good as they think they can. Many Dutch people change a Dutch word and make it sound English, or literally translate a saying into English. Here are some funny/strange examples:
I always get my sin.
Dutch sentence: “Ik krijg altijd mijn zin”.
Real English sentence: “I always get what I want.”
May I thank your cock for the lovely dinner?
Dutch sentence: “Mag ik de kok bedanken voor het heerlijke eten?”
Real English sentence: “May I thank the cook for the lovely dinner?”
I fock horses.
Dutch sentence: “Ik fok paarden.”
Real English sentence: “I breed horses.”
You should not look a given horse in the back.
Dutch sentence: “Je moet een gegeven paard nooit in de bek kijken.”
It is a saying. It means that you should be happy with your present.
You can calculate on that.
Dutch sentence “Daar kan je op rekenen.”
Real English sentence: “You can count on that.”
What’s on the hand?
Dutch sentence “Wat is er aan de hand?”
Real English sentence: “What’s wrong?”
That smells an hour in the wind!
Dutch sentence “Dat ruikt een uur in de wind!”
Real English sentence: “That smells really bad!”
He is underway.
Dutch sentence “Hij is onderweg.”
Real English sentence: “He is on his way.”
Make that the cat wise.
Dutch sentence “Maak dat de kat wijs.”
Real English sentence: “I don’t believe you.”
You are not good snick.
Dutch sentence “Jij bent niet goed snik.”
Real English sentence: “You are crazy.”
I have you in the holes.
Dutch sentence “Ik heb je in de gaten.”
Real English sentence: “I’m watching you.”
There comes the monkey out of the sleeve.
Dutch sentence “Daar komt de aap uit de mouw.”
Real English sentence: “Now we see what’s real.”
And possibly the worst mistake a Dutchman can make:
When they say this when they are mad at you, they really mean it this way. The problem is, that the way you guys say “whore”, we have a word that’s pronounced exactly the same. It’s called “hoor”. There is no literal translation for it in English, but it’s a bit like “you know”.